Janet was always looking out for things she could buy for the kids - little treats, toys, books or items of clothing. She was very kind and I often chatted to her. Like her daughter and son-in-law, she was staunchly working class with typically old-fashioned values.
The manager of the shop was Catherine - a couple of years younger than me and in most ways a great, hard-working shop manager but looking back I think she was also a bit of a misandrist. She had put a poster up in the shared staff toilet advising men about how to use toilets, including leaving the toilet seat down for female users. It was not a joke.
Anyway at the back of the shop floor there was a door that led to the staff area and just beyond that door you would often find Catherine sorting out clothing donations - separating the wheat from the chaff as it were. On the shop side of the door was where children's books and toys were displayed.
Late on a Wednesday afternoon in March 2020 with no other customers in the shop, Janet had found a colouring book that she wanted to give to her little grandson Roy. She showed it to me and asked what I thought about it. Now this colouring book was very clearly aimed at little girls. It had a pink cover and contained mermaids and seahorses and cute little princesses.
I said to Janet, "I think it's aimed at little girls and I am not sure that your daughter and son-in-law would be too happy about it, Maybe we can find something more suitable for Roy."
At that moment the back door opened and in front of Janet I was angrily berated by Catherine, "How dare you say that! If my daughter heard you saying that about books she would rip your head off!"
I was flabbergasted but because Janet was still standing there I could not say a thing.
I had worked at the Oxfam shop for just over five years and because of that had received a bronze badge for my voluntary service. Although I could have done battle with Catherine and given her a piece of my mind about this incident, I decided to walk away instead.
The following week when she was having a day off, I left a letter on her desk saying, "I have always been happy working in this shop and I am proud of the service I have given to Oxfam but I am not happy any more and so I won't be returning". When you are an unpaid volunteer you have that luxury of being able to just walk away.
The following week the shop closed for the duration of the first COVID lockdown. I still think to myself - how dare she try to angrily correct me in front of a customer and how dare she jump to such a wrongful conclusion anyway. She had, I think, never seen or met Janet before and knew nothing about her circumstances.
from Yorkshire Pudding https://ift.tt/gSv1l6C