Heart

It’s the simple things that teach me the most. God, You use anything. Always using the ordinary to prove a point. Lacing up my new braces this morning left me almost in a fit of rage. As much as I appreciate the new, I was ready to embrace the old, comfortable and worn in braces. They’re dirty and battered. I’m acquainted with them. The new ones are not exactly the same shape, consistency and feel. The laces are different. They look similar, but not the same. I notice I can complain about blessings. The braces are blessings. It is a privilege to walk. Putting one foot forward after the other is an honor. It’s not something I’m fully cognizant of until I sit and let it simmer.  My complaint is another’s blessing. 

My gratitude list

Cerebral Palsy-you have given me more than I deserve. Seeing the world in a way I would never have otherwise. You break my heart daily. It’s not a bad thing. It gives me a gratitude for the nation of my birth. I’m granted the desires of my heart almost every day. 

God-  When I honestly and wholeheartedly seek you, I’m truly stunned at what You do in every moment. Why, no longer matters. I still want to know, but I’m afraid I already know. Without Cerebral Palsy I wonder if I would fully depend on you.  It’s true. I am too stubborn for my own good. I think I know it all way too much. CP humbles me in a way that shatters me. I am left gasping for breath. In need of air from the giver of my life. 

Broken, reimagined and rewoven. Each and every day. 

The song says “You can have my heart”. You made it. I just share it back with its Creator

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