Down The Bog

Oh Bollocks
I dropped my phone down the toilet yesterday
It had been used
The phone and the toilet that is..
It’s working in a fashion,
That is the phone and not the toilet
The toilet is working perfectly.

Oh I was sooo fucking annoyed
I placed the phone in the bowl of rice as per instructions and stormed off to bed
I didn’t hear the delivery guy knocking at the door so the box was a lovely surprise when I finally surfaced at 2pm in order to walk the dogs.

On the doorstep was this



When I opened it there was this


And when I finally opened this , there were.......
And be still my beating heart 
THESE!!!

As Miriam Margolyes once eloquently said “ I almost creamed in my knickers!” 
What a lovely surprise 
It didn’t come with a signed card, so I have no idea who sent it, so please if you did can you let me know! 
Scotch Eggs From Fortum and Mason
WHAT AN EFFING TREAT!!






تعليقات

إرسال تعليق

المشاركات الشائعة من هذه المدونة

Easter

صورة
Stewart prepared a special Easter Sunday dinner. The Lamb of God was on the menu with roasted potatoes, Yorkshire puddings, leeks, carrots, parsnips and peas. For dessert, Shirley had followed the vegan sticky toffee pudding recipe in the first "Bosh!" cook book  and all was good. Earlier there had been an Easter egg hunt for the little ones and then we all went off to a Sheffield museum that I had not visited in many years - The Emergency Services Museum at West Bar. Greatly improved and still run by volunteers, it was a perfect excursion for all of us and we finished up in the museum's little cafe enjoying a light lunch. We had seen police cars, ambulances, fire engines and even a redundant lifeboat called "City of Sheffield". We all enjoyed the visit. As you might imagine, I will be coming back to this museum in a future post. On the way there,  the roads had been blocked off near Sheffield Children's Hospital as 750 motorcyclists arrived at Weston P...
Read more »

Today

صورة
The view from Simon's back yard. It takes an hour and a half to travel to the village where I was born and raised. Today, Shirley came with me and saw my brother Simon for the first time since August 2019. As a nurse for more than forty years, she was not daunted by his changed appearance. With the cancer and everything he has become a bag of bones. So painfully thin - like a malnourished prisoner working on the Burma railway under Japanese supervision.  Wasting away. We stayed all afternoon.  Shirley had his washing machine on and we changed his bedding. I had bought a new fitted sheet, duvet cover and pillowcases from Tesco. Shirley said that his old bedding was "disgusting".  We brought tins of mushroom soup and cans of "Fanta" and "Coke" and some pots of chocolate mousse plus a couple of pints of milk. They were received with zero gratitude. In fact, he insisted that six cans of soup was far too many. I encouraged him to have a bath while...
Read more »